Succumbed...

I went back to the dr's today for the results of my xray and they tell me I have osteoarthritis.

It was a bit of a blow but from what they've said, it doesn't have to stop my running... however at the moment it's so bad I can't run... so I'm taking at least two days off... I won't make my 250kms this month. Not happy about that!!!

Not happy about the fact that it's not a condition that gets better... it will only get worse. Maybe not for some time but it's not reversible.

I'll have to search the internet to see what other runners do.

I was trying to get answers from the doctor but didn't really.
I was trying to ask him if running would aggravate it.. Obviously it will when I have the pain, but if the pain eases up, or if it's better with pain relief and I run, will I make it bad again?
I didn't get the answer to that question...

So I didn't run today and I'm really sad about that too....

Feel The Love

It's been a hard running week mainly due to a persistent back injury. Still, I'm managing to keep the kms going up.

Hubby and I may be going away for a few days... that will put a stop to my kms for the month but I have to learn to not get stressed about things like that... especially now when I'm not actually training for anything!

I'm up to 186kms so far this month... I'd love to see it around the 250kms mark and if we don't go away, should be able to get close... We'll see...

But I wanted to write about something else.

The other day hubby asked me how I was feeling about my body these days.

I've always considered myself chunky yet solid. I've always HATED, absolutely HATED my bigger bottom half. My legs are just huge. My bottom is wobbly and my legs are a not so nice mixture of solid and wobbly... full of jelly fat with nice hard muscle underneath...

I've run 1893kms so far this year so it's not a question of not enough exercise... it's just my genetics. (I've been running for 10 years)

Slowly I'm coming to terms with it.

I don't like it, but I'm almost able to accept it.

But when hubby asked me that question, I almost surprised myself with my answer.

I told him I actually am proud of my body. I'm proud of what my legs have managed to do. They've carried me through many kms and have helped me achieve my goal of running a marathon.

They may not be the prettiest things but goddam they're strong! So how can I not love that?

And yes I'll continue to wear long tops that hide my bottom and will switch to a running skirt when running in an event (hides the bottom nicely!) but I won't hate anymore... those body bits are mine and I'm damn proud of them!

Loving September...

I don't know what it is but I'm really enjoying running lately.

Yeah it's still hard but I'm working well with my mind again so I can just shut it out and let the body do it's thing.

Maybe it's because I'm not focused on an event?

Maybe it's because I'm starting to feel like a "real" runner now that I've run a marathon

Maybe it's because I know missing a week or two doesn't make a difference in the scheme of things and know what I have to do to be fully prepared for next years marathon..

I don't know.. I just know that I'm in a recovery phase right now but I'm running a lot of kms and enjoying it...

Injury wise... sometimes I think I'm completely cured and other times I'm not so sure having hip pains and lower back pains at the oddest time. They're not constant but when they come on, they make it difficult to move and I wonder how I run at all!! yet other times I feel great!

And I was having shooting pains through my legs the few weeks after the marathon but that seems to have gone too..

Another lesson learnt.... don't persist in shoes you KNOW aren't good for you!!!!


Total kms for September so far, 114kms